Whispers in the Wind
by Roeschen
Summary: Arwen’s thoughts as she rides to Minas Tirith and the coronation of Aragorn


**Title: **Whispers in the wind

**Author:** Roeschen

**Summary: **Arwen's thoughts as she rides to Minas Tirith and the coronation of Aragorn

**Disclaimer: **Though I do not own Lord of the Rings, I own my story.

* * *

I love him. The softly whispered words are carried away from the light breeze I feel on my face. For him I gave everything up. I raise my head to look at the White City which has appeared on the horizon. Minas Tirith, my future home. When I see the walls I suppress a shudder. In front of me I see a cage with the power to break me. Quickly I force back the image.

I do not know where the thoughts come from with which I struggle since our departure from Imladris, but suddenly I realize that I'm afraid. Afraid of what will await me there, within those walls which gleam like snow in the glaring sunlight.

So many years I have longed for the day Estel would be crowned and we would marry but now as our arrival in the city is rapidly approaching, an inexplicable desire to flee is seizing me. I dread even to meet him, my Estel. My thoughts wander to the past, to the last happy moment, I spent with him. I see us standing on the bridge. I promised him my love, gave him the Evenstar. It is a present I said as he wanted to return it to me in the evening before he left with the fellowship. Even if I suspect what made him say these words, they hit me hard. Was it really only a dream?

And before I knew it, he was gone, had left me alone. The days passed slowly. Nightmares tormented me; the knowledge which danger he was in always present. Only of Estel I could think.

I knew the time had come, which would seal my fate forever. Soon I would have to reach a decision.

But, if the fellowship should succeed in destroying the ring, would the day finally come where I would become his bride, where I would become his?

Estel's words had awakened doubts in me, which I would never have believed possible. So dark was the time since our last farewell that I was incapable of defending myself from the gloomy prediction my father depicted for my future, should I stay in Middle Earth. Thoughts plagued me, which I couldn't oppress. And I asked myself: What do I know of Estel? So brief were the times we spent together, so precious the time that he never told me much of what he endured, experienced in the North, in Rohan and Gondor. So little I know of those years as I would be a stranger to him, and not his beloved. I thought about the women he surely had met in those years, I wondered if there hadn't been any with whom he had fallen in love.

My father urged me to leave Middle Earth and I went, set off to the ships, which would bring me to Valinor. And yet I fled from the forest. As I saw my son, our son, running towards his father and Estel catching him and swirling him around I knew that I had to return.

I flinch as I hear my name. I see Ada's concerned look. We have arrived at the gates. We are in Minas Tirith. I force myself to smile. Quickly I avert my eyes.

It was my choice; it was I who rode back to Imladris, me, who persuaded him to reforge Narsil and me who asked him to bring the sword to Estel. I know he wouldn't have done it hadn't I returned and demanded this of him. His hope that I would go and leave Middle Earth I shattered, so how could I let him see the doubts raging inside me? Doubts which seized me, as I heard that Sauron had been defeated, that the One Ring had been destroyed. For Estel I gave everything up and yet how can't he have changed after everything that happened?

He can't be still the same. Will Estel still love me?

The loud calls and cheers of the people crowding the streets attract my attention. Apparently they are overjoyed. Soon they will have a king, the evil has been banished. A new age has dawned. They stare at me. Timidly I smile, but the many gazes make me nervous.

The narrow streets and the houses seem to crush me, though I see how beautiful the White City is. But it couldn't compare to the forests I so love and the tress and flowers; the city seems cold, lifeless.

Finally we dismount from our horses. They are led away and my father unfurls the standard and hands it to me. I'm glad that I've taken it with me. It was meant to be a surprise for Estel, as I told Ada. Estel should not see me too early. Ada believed me and when I said it then it was the truth. But now I can't help to think that it will give me a bit more time before I have to face him.

My father takes my arm, and I, so hard it is, chase away my thoughts. The coronation has begun. I tug the smooth material of the standard aside and look carefully up. My hands clutch the rough wood of the rod as Mithrandir lifts the crown and sets it upon Estel's head.

Estel turns around and I hardly recognize him. No longer is he a ranger of the North, in front of me I see a king, the King of Gondor. As the wind freshens up white flowers float to the ground. I gaze to the tree, whose branches bend heavenly under the weight of the flowers.

How beautiful it is, I think awed and for an instant I admire it. Estel's eyes also rest on the tree that is more than a symbol as I involuntarily realize.

Estel begins to sing. Hearing his voice warmth fills me. Suddenly I'm sure, he is still my Estel.

He comes forward, steps down the stairs. He inclines the head, nods to those who bow to him.

Then he stands in front of Legolas. Me, however, Estel can't see. I've hidden behind the standard I carry. But I hear my father's voice that tells me to go to him. I take a little step and he looks in my direction.

Estel's hand grips the standard, lets it fall to the side. His face is expressionless, as he stares at me. My heart thuds painfully in my chest. Unable to breath, I'm suddenly even afraid of him, fear everything and doubt that my choices were right. I cast my eyes down. At the same instant I feel his fingers beneath my chin. Gently he raises my head. I feel his lips claiming mine. My fear leaves me as I cling to him.

Such happiness I feel that my legs would have given way, if he hadn't hold me so tightly. He softly strokes my cheek, catches my tears as I gaze up in his silver-grey eyes which shine with love. Secured in his embrace I am ashamed, can't understand anymore how I ever could have doubted our love, how I could have forgotten my own words I said to him once. 'Trust us,' I had whispered. Never again I will forget them.

Estel kisses me once more and when he let go of me I look over his shoulder to the white tree and the citadel which will be my future home and I know Minas Tirith will be no cage, not as long as Estel is by my side, not as long as his arms are holding me, not as long as he loves me.

I love you, I whisper and this time the wind doesn't carry my words away. This time he hears me and he whispers back. I begin to smile, to laugh, as he takes my hand and draws me close to him.


End file.
